Circuit: Bhai america mein address puchega tho kya bolne ka?

Munna Bhai: Dhobhi Ghaat.

Circuit: Bhai english mein bolneka tho?

Munna Bhai: Bolne ka, Washing Town.


Circuit: Bhai idhar aane ko kya bolne ka?

Munna Bhai: Come Here.

Circuit: Bhai phir udhar jaaneko kya bolthe hai?

Munna Bhai: Pehle udhar jaaneka phir bolneka come here.


Circuit: Bhai yeh kaisa bolne ka – chale hat hawa aane de?

Munna Bhai: Simple hain Circuit, Bolne ka, “Hey u move sideways let the air force come in.”


Circuit: Bhai tum tho pass ho gayela bhai?

Munna Bhai: Yes bro I have just passed away.


Munna Bhai: Abhi tu bol “eh mamu bheja mat phira.”

Circuit: Mother’s brother don’t rotate my brain.


Munna Bhai: Yeh bol “Idhar aa khajhur detha hun karcha pani.” {kajhur yaane date}

Circiut: Come with me for a date I will pay you.


Munna Bhai: Ab yeh bol “Apun ko bahut sardi ho gayi hai.”

Circuit: I got big winter in small nose.


PROFESSOR: Gandhi Jayanti ke baray mein kya jante ho?

MUNNA BHAI: Gandhi bahut zabardast aadmi tha, Baap. Maa Kasam,

Par apun ko yeh nehin maloom ke yeh Jayanti kaun hai.


MUNNA BHAI: Circuit, bole toh yeh Ford kya hai?

CIRCUIT: Bhai, gaadi hai.

MUNNA BHAI: Toh phir, yeh Oxford kya hai?

CIRCUIT: Bole toh, simple hai bhai, Ox mane Bael, Ford mane gaadi. Oxford bole toh Baelgaadi.


CIRCUIT: Bhai, Bapu ne bola tha ke kabhi jhoot nehin bolna mangta hai.

Apun aaj se kabhi jhoot nehin bolega Bhai.

MUNNA BHAI: Aye Circuit, woh Sabrina ka baap aya hai tere ko dhund rehla hai.

CIRCUIT: Bhai usko bolo apun gaoon gayea hai, kheti karne ko.

MUNNA BHAI: Par Circuit, abhi to tu bola kabhi jhoot nehin bolega.

CIRCUIT: Bhai, apun jhoot nehin bolega, par tum to bol sakta hai na.


CIRCUIT: Bhai, apnay ko char mahinay mein Sindhi sikhna padega. Kuch hal batao.

MUNNA BHAI: Sindhi kyun, aur char mahinay ka kya chakkar hai?

CIRCUIT: Bhai, Mainay ek Sindhi baccha adopt kiya hai, aur woh char mahinay mein bolne lagay ga.


Circuit takes a flight to Singapore and he is seated next to an Englishman.

Circuit open his tiffin and serves himself a roti.

ENGLISHMAN: What is this?

CIRCUIT: Bread India.

Circuit then open the box of jalebi.

ENGLISHMAN: What is this?

CIRCUIT: Sweet India.

With all the food he hogged on, Munna farts.

The Englishman is offended and in shock asks …

ENGLISHMAN: What is that?

CIRCUIT: Air India.


MUNNA BHAI: Circuit, tereko malum hai, apun bachpan mein 20 maley ke building se gir gaya tha.

CIRCUIT: Aarey bhai, phir kya hua. Bach gaya ki tapak gaya?

MUNNA BHAI: Yaad nahin hai yaar. Bahut purani baat hai.


MUNNA BHAI: Mamu, tu kitna padha hai?

MAMU: B.A.

MUNNA BHAI: Sala, two lafz padha aur woh bhi ulta?


MUNNA BHAI: Oye Circuit, yeh sala light bulb pe baap ka naam kyu likh raha hai?

CIRCUIT: Bhai, Apun baap ka naam roshan kar rehle hai, Bhai.


PRINCIPAL: Agar koi ladka girls hostel mein gaya toh first time 100 Rs fine, 2nd time 200 Rs. Fine and 3rd time 500.

MUNNA BHAI: Boley to, Monthly paas ka kya lega Mamu?


Munna bhai: Circuit MURGA & MURGI me diffrence kaise samajhne ka?

Circuit: Simple hai bhai..

Ek patthar marne ka, Agar BHAGA to MURGA or BHAGI to MURGI.


MUNNA BHAI: ABEY CIRCUT YE BARISH KE TIME BIJLI KYUN CHAMAKTI HAI RE?

CIRCUT: Bhai, bolay to upper wala torch maar kar dekhta hoga kahin sookha to nahi reh gaya.


MUNNA BHAI: Apun ka desh kaun chalata hai?

CIRCUIT: Bhai, simple hai… apna SMS.

MUNNA BHAI: Kya fekta hai?

CIRCUIT: Bhai sms bole to … Apna,

SARDAR MANMOHAN SINGH…


MUNNA BHAI: Ye Ramnavmi kyo manai jaati hai?

CIRCUIT: Arey simple hai Bhai…

Is din bhagwan RAM aathvi pass karke Navmi me gaye the.


After Finishing MBBS, Dr. Munna Starts his practice.

He 1st checks the patient’s eyes, tongue & ears with a Torch & finally declares

“BOLE TO…….. TORCH THEEEEK HAI, MAMU.”


Munna Bhai: Abay Circuit, Jaa baju walay ghar say Doctor ko bula ke laa, meri tabiat kharab ho reli hai.

Cirkit: Par Bhai,.. aap to khud doctor ho.

Munna Bhai: Bolay to meri fees buhat zyada hai na re.


Munna: Yaar Circuit, Ye Gandhiji Har note me haste kyu rehte hai?

Circuit: Simple hai bhai! Royenge to note gila ho jaye ga.


Munna Bhai: Aay circuit, baapu bole toh gandhi ji kapde kyu nahi pehantay thay?

Circuit: Bhai bole toh bapu bhi us time ke Salmaan Khan hoyenge!!!


Exam’s song by Munna bhai:

Chanda Mama so Gaye,

Student sarey jage.

Dekho pakdo yaron,

Ghadi ke kaante bhaage.

Ek pariksha khatam,to duji

Shuru ho gayi MAAMU.


Munna Bhai: Bolay to Apun ko tera operation dobara karna paray ga.

Kyun ke apun kay rubber ke gloves teray andar hi reh gaye hain.

Patient: Agar yeh baat hai to mujhay jaanay do. Mien tumharay gloves ki payment kar doon ga.


Circuit: Bhai Jail Ko Hindi Me Hawalaat kyun Kehte Hain?

Munna Bhai: Kyunki Jail Mein Khane Ko Sirf Hawa Aur Laat Hi Milti Hai.


Munna bhai: American rastrapati sala kaha rehta hai?

Circut: Bhai, Dhobigath pe.

Munna bhai: Dhobigath bole to?

Circut: Bhai englih main usko “Washington” kehte hai.


Munna Bhai: Circuit, apun k mind me 1 laucha chal rela he, ye Bagla 1 tang utha k kase ko sota he?

Circuit: aray simple hai Bhai, bolay to agar Bagla dosri tang bhi utha lega to gir jai ga na, Bhai.


Teacher to circuit: Munna bhai ne raat ko khana khaya, is sentence ka future tense banao.

Circuit: Munna bhai subah potty karega.


Munna Bhai: Circuit apun ko 1 Nurse se Pyar ho gayela hai, luv Letter me kya Likhu?

Circuit: Simple hai Bhai, Likhne ka “DEAR SISTER I LOV U “MUNNA BHAI”


MUNNA BHAI: Circuit agar bina daant wala kutta kate to kya karne ka re?

CIRCUIT: Simple he Bhai, bina sui wala injection lene ka!!!


MUNNA BHAI visits Mysore palace.

CIRCUIT: Bhai us kursi par mat baithna.

Munna Bhai: Kaiku?

CIRCUIT: Wo tipu sultan ki he bhai.

Munna Bhai: Tension kaiku leta he re maamu? Aayega to uth jaunga re, I shappath !!!


LECTURER: Write a note on Gandhi Jayanti.

CIRCUIT WRITES: Gandhi was a great man, but maa kasam I don’t know who is Jayanti. Koi locha-lafda hoga buddhe ka!


Munna Bhai: Ae Circuit ye Dr. log opration se pehle patient ko behosh kyun karte hai?

Circuit: Bhai! Bole to patient opration sikh gaya to Dr. Logo ki to wat lag jayegi na.


Circuit: Bhai, apun ne kal Sania Mirza se phone pe baat ki.

Munna bhai: Arre wah, kya kaha usne.

Circuit: Usne kaha, Mamu wrong number!!


Munn Bhai: College ka fulform kya hota he Circuit?

Circuit: Boleto Bhai,

C-come
O-on
L-love
L-lets
E-every
G-girl
E-every day
Bhai!!


Good Night in Munna Bhai Style:

Chand fekta hai light,
Boleto hogayi hai night,
To band karneka light,
Sojane ka tight,
Samje Tubelight,
Boleto Good Night.


Munna Aur Circuit Jurassic Park Dekhne Jaate Hai.

Munna Bhai: Circuit Tu Kyon Darta Hai, Film hi Toh Hai.

CIRCUIT: Bhai Apne Ko Pata hai yeh Film Hai, Tumko pata hai ke yeh Film hai, Lekin Us bechare Jaanwar Ko Thodi pata hai ki yeh film hai.


Munna Bhai: Arre Circuit apne rikshaw se ek pahiya kyun nikaal raha hai.

Circuit: Arre bhai, bole toh yahan board laga hai. Parking for 2 wheelers only.


Munna bhai: “Circuit, agar bus pe tu chade, ya fir tujpe bus chad Jaye to kya hoga”!!

Circuit: “Bole to Bhai, dono baar ticket apna hi katega.”


Professor: Munna, Batao Akal badi ya bhais?

Muna Bhai: Bole to pahle date of birth bata Mamu.


Munna Bhai: Abey Circuit Agar Maa Ke Charno Me Jannat Hoti Hai To Nani Ke Charno Me Kya Hoti Hai?

Circuit: Simple Hai Bhai,.. Nani Ke Charno Me Jannat 2 Hoti Hai.


Circuit: Bhai Ek Rikshaw Me Ek Takli Aurat Beitraily He Use English Me Kya Kahate Hai??

Munnabhai: Simple hai re circuit, Usko bolneka “Autometacly”


Munna Bhai Aur Circuit Shikar Per Jate Hai Circuit Ko Ek Mor Dikhta Hai…

Circuit: Bhai….. mor… mor..”

Munna Bhai Mor Ko Goli Mar Ke Kehta Hai: ”No More!”


Munna Bhai Ke Ghar Ladki Hue.

Circuit: Bhai Ab To Muhale Ke, Sare Ladke Isko Line Marenge.

Munna Bhai: Tu Fikar Mat Kar Re, Apun Iska Naam “Didi” Rakhenge.


Munna Bhai: Chand Pe Pahla Kadam Kisne Rakha?

Circiut: Bhai! Niel Armstrom Ne!

Munna Bhai: Aur Dusra?

CIRCUIT: Kya Bhai? Dusra Bhi Usinech Rakha Hoyenga Na, Langda Thodi Tha Wo.


Munna Bhai: Teray ko maaloom hai ke cigarette aik tarah say slow poison ka kaam karti hai?

Patient: To mujhay konsa marnay ki jaldi hai bhai.


Munna Bhai: Meray paas aik buri khabar hai, aur aik buhat hi buri khabar hai teray wastay.

Patient: Acha to pehlay buri khabar suna daal.

Munna Bhai: Apun ke paas jo teri report pahunchi us me likha tha ke teray paas sirf 24 ghantay hain zinda rehnay ke liye.

Patient: Sirf 24 ghantay, is say buri khabar kya ho sakti hai.

Munna Bhai: (Jadu ki Japhhi Dalte Huye) Mein kal say teray tak pahunchnay ki koshish kar raha hoon.


CIRCUIT: Bhai, who apnay bachpan ka dost aarehla aaj raat ko dinner pe. Mera Sara chain collection apnay kamray mein chupa do na please.

MUNNABHAI: Kyun tera dost chor hai kya?

CIRCUIT: Nahin Bhai, who apnay chain pehchan lega na.