Tag: Best Indian Jokes

Teacher is teaching science & the topic is "electricity". Teacher: to a Boy, beta what I have written on white board? Boy: mam "eletratity". Teacher: No pronounce correctly it is electricity. Boy: "eletratity". Teacher: no electricity. Boy: "eletratity". Teacher: after some time, ok call your Father tomorrow. Father came next day... Teacher: your son is called eletratity to electricity. I made him understand a lot that it is...

Without any prejudice... Donald Trump was sitting in his office wondering whom to invade next when his telephone rang. "Hello, Mr. Trump!" a heavily accented voice said, "This is Sardar Gurmukh from Phagwara, District Kapurthala, Punjab... I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring the war on you!" "Well, Gurmukh," Trump replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your...

A couple was traveling on a train going on honeymoon. The train was full So they had to share the coach with an old man. The man turned to his wife and said when we want to make love we must say "LETS MAKE ROTI", So they continued made love the entire night. In the morning the husband asks how many Rotis did...

Doctor: Ab aapki tabiyat kaisi hai? Patient: Doctor saheb.. Pehle se jyada kharab ho gayi hai. Doctor: dawai khali thi kya? Patient : Nai doctor saheb. Dawai ki shishi to bhari hui thi. Doctor: Arey... mere kehne ka matlab hai ki, dawai le li thi kya. Patient: Ji, aapne dawai de di thi aur Maine le li thi. Doctor: Abe, dawai pili thi kya? Patient: Oho,...

Lalu Prasad sent his Bio Data - to apply for a post in Microsoft Corporation, USA. A few days later he got this reply: Dear Mr. Lalu Prasad, You do not meet our requirements. Please do not send any further correspondence. No phone call shall be entertained. Thanks Bill Gates. Lalu prasad jumped with joy on receiving this reply. He arranged a press conference : "Bhaiyon aur Behno, aap...

When the boy was returning after his marriage. He found his wife holding a small packet; The boy asked.. what's there in that packet. Wife replied:,.. "Darling this is the secret of my life. Please never open it or ask me about it further.. otherwise our marriage will be in trouble." The couple spent their days happily.. but the boy was very keen to know...

Joke Title: A Month Overdue Mr. Sharma comes home one night, and his wife throws her arms around his neck: "I have great news, I'm a month overdue. I think we are going to have a baby! The doctor gave me a test today, but until we find out for sure, we can't tell anybody." The next day, Mrs. Sharma receives a telephone...

One day, three consultants, one from Wipro, one from Infosys and one from TCS, went out for a walk. "Why don't we prove who is the best among ourselves?" Why not, said the other two. The Infosian said: "Let's have a test. Whoever makes this monkey laugh, works for the best firm". Being a pure logical strategist, the person from TCS tried to make...

A family in Gujarat was puzzled when the coffin of their dead mother (Ba) arrived from the US. It was sent by one of the daughters. The dead body was very tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in it when they opened the lid; they found a letter on top addressed to her brothers and sisters: Dear Chandrakant bhai, Arvind...

Officer : What Is Your Name? Candidate : M P. Sir. Officer : Tell Me Properly. Candidate : Mohan Pal Sir. Officer : Your Father's Name? Candidate : M P. Sir. Officer : What Does That Mean? Candidate : Manmohan Pal Sir. Officer : Your Native Place. Candidate : M P. Sir. Officer : Is It Madhya Pradesh? Candidate : No, Munnur Pal Sir. Officer : What Is Your Qualification? Candidate :...

Santa and Banta decided to rent a boat on a lake for their favorite sport fishing. After fishing for 4 hours at various places around the lake with no luck at all,... they decided to try one more spot before calling it quits, Suddenly things started to happen, and they caught plenty of fish within twenty minutes. Banta said: "Hey we should mark...

JOKE TITLE: A SHORT MARRIAGE STORY Reena was about to leave office after finishing her work. She got a call from her husband Abhishek, Reena (R): "Hello, yes Abhishek ". Abhishek (A): "Reena, can you open my gmail and get a print out of the mail from that US consultant I forgot to take it in my office." (R): "Yes, I can, I need...

Santa : Why did the man put his radio in his refrigerator? Banta : I give up. Santa : Stupid, because he wanted to hear cool music. Jasmeet : "Your honor, I want to divorce my husband Santa." Judge : "But why?" Jasmeet : "Because he is not faithful to me." Judge : "How do you know ?" Jasmeet : "My lord, not a single child...

A lie machine is bought. It works in the following way... If the truth is told - the machine won't give any sound If a lie is told - the machine will give a sound 'KIRRRRRRRR...' Now there are three Indians. One Bengali, one Madrasi and one Sardarji. Their correspondences are given infront of the lie machine. And Here it goes... Bengali:- 'I think I can...

Enough of Sardar jokes... Mallu jokes are here! 1) What is the tax on a Mallu's income called? IngumDax 2) Where did the Malayali study? In the ko-liage. 3) Why did the Malayali not go to ko-liage today? He is very bissi. 4) Why did the Malayali buy an air-ticket? To go to Thuubai, zimbly to meet his ungle in Gelff. 5) Why do...

There was a Sardarji who was down on his luck. In order to raise some money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. He went to a playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you." Sardarji then wrote a note saying: "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put Rs. 2,00,000 in a paper...

An Englishman, an Scotsman and our Santa went on a mountain climbing expedition together. Everything was going fine until one day, while they were walking along a narrow ledge,.. an avalanche ripped away the ledge on each side of them. As they stood there wondering what to do, with the freezing night closing in,.. there was a strange shimmering in the air and...

Joke Title: Give Me A Break Two men, one American and an Indian were sitting in a bar drinking shot after shot. The Indian man said to the American, "You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village,.. Whom I haven't even met once. We call this arranged marriage. I don't want to marry...

A crazy Desi was running amuck in central business area of Banglore. He saw one American guy. He approached him and said, "You are Japanese." The American said, "No, I am American." Crazy Desi goes again raising his voice, "No you are Japanese." The polite American said, "No, No, I am American sir" Crazy Desi says in yelling voice, "You are Japanese." The scared American replies in conformance, "Yes, I am Japanese." The...

Joke Title: Friend Circle Lalu Prasad Yadav came home from a secret two year mission only to find his wife, Rabri, with a new born baby. Furious, he was determined to track down the father to extract revenge. "Was it my friend Banta", he demanded. "No !" his weeping wife replied. "Was it my friend Ramta then?" he asked. "No !!!" she said even more...

Three Khoja friends meet after many years. Two of them have just returned from spending some years in the new motherland, Canada. The first one says, "When I went to Canada, they nicknamed me 'Sad' because my full name is Sadru!" The second one says, "When I went to Canada, my neighbors called me 'Bad' because my full name is Badru!" The third one says, * * * * * * * * * * * "I...

Why Bill Gates SOLD OFF Microsoft. Letter from Banta Singh of Punjab to Mr. Bill Gates of Microsoft Subject: Problems with my new computer Dear Mr. Bill Gates, We have bought a computer for our home and we have found some problems, which I want to bring to your notice. There is a button 'start' but there is no 'stop' button. We request you...

Generation Next Motto: Na hum shaadi karenge, na apne bachchon ko karne denge. "U love someone U marry someone else. The one you marry becomes your wife or husband. And the one you loved becomes the password of your mail id." There's only one perfect child in the world & every mother has it. There's only one perfect wife in the world & every neighbor...

Bill Gates organized an enormous session to recruit a new Chairman for Microsoft Europe. 5000 candidates assembled in a large room. One candidate is Kantibhai Shah. Bill Gates: "Thank you for coming. Those who do not know JAVA may leave." 2000 people leave the room. Kantibhai says to himself:, "I do not know JAVA but I have nothing to lose if I stay. I'll...

A rich Arab was admitted to the Lilavati Hospital in Mumbai for a heart transplant. Prior to the surgery, the doctors needed to store his blood type in case need arose. As the Arab had a rare type of blood, it couldn't be found locally. So the call went out to a number of countries. Finally a Gujarati was located who had a...

Lalu Prasad Yadav driving along the highway one evening when all of a sudden nature calls. He sees a little bar up the way and he pulls into the parking lot. When he gets inside, he finds the place is packed! The bar is crowded with people trying to get drinks, ladies are dancing on the tables and there's hardly standing room...

Boss: Arz kiya hai... Office may Kaam hota hain... Galtiyon ka sama hota hai... Aise mausam mein hi to PERFORMANCE jawan hota hai... Dil ki khunnas BOSS Zabaan se nahi kehte... Ye fasana to appraisal mein bayan hota hai... Employee's reply: Arz kiya hai... Appraisal hota hain... Disappointment ka sama hota hai... Aise mausam mein hi to Attrition jawan hota hai... Dil ki khunnas HUM jabaan se nahi kehte... Ye...