Thursday, January 24, 2019
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Tag: Funny Short Joke

Hilarious Short Non Veg Dirty Joke: Naughty Dentist VS Nervous Woman
A nervous lady sat on a dentist's chair to get her tooth extracted, seeing too many instruments she got frightened. "Doctor, I would much rather have a baby than my tooth pulled out." The dentist retorted : * * * * * * * "Well make up your mind, ... so that I can adjust the chair accordingly".
Short Humorous Joke: Drunk Husband Gets Late Night Education
Drunk Husband was brought into night court,.. having been picked up on suspicion of being the notorious night prowler. "What were you doing out at 3 A.M.?" the judge sternly queried Husband. "I was going to a lecture." answered Husband "A lecture at 3 A.M.?" The judge was scornful. "Oh, sure," said Husband. * * * * * "Sometimes my wife stays up longer than that just to lecture me."
Hilarious Non Veg PC Humor Joke: Naughty Husband, Wife & New Computer
A woman was helping her husband set up his new computer and,... at the appropriate point in the process, she told him that he would now need to enter a password. Something he could remember easily and would use each time he had to log on. The husband was a bit bored by the process and, feeling in a rather amorous mood, figured...
Hilarious Joke: A Smart Husband Sent A Text To His Wife At Night
A husband sent a text to his wife at night, "Hi I will get late, please try and wash all my dirty clothes and make sure you prepare my favorite dish before I return." but there was no reply he received from wife... He sent another text, "And I forgot to tell you that I got an increase in my salary, at the...
Stupid Joke: Blonde Walks Into A Doctors Office
Blonde walks into a doctors office and says: "Doctor, what's the problem with me? When I touch my arm, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my leg, ouch! it hurts... When I touch my head, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my chest, ouch! it really hurts!" . . . . . . . . . . . The Doctor replies: "Your finger is broken."
Funny Short Joke: A Man On Mount Sinai Speaking To God
A man climbs to the top of Mt. Sinai and gets close enough to talk to God. Looking up, he asks the Lord, "God, what does a million years mean to you?" The Lord replies, "A minute." The man then asks, "And what does a million dollars mean to you?" The Lord replies, "A penny." He perks up and asks, "So, can I have a penny?" Lord replies, . . . . . . . . . "In...
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray, "Take only one. God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate...
The son of a rich Saudi sheikh arrives in Germany for his University studies. He soon writes home to his father. Dear Dad, Berlin is wonderful, the people are nice and I really like it here, but Dad I am a little ashamed to be riding to class every day in my 24k gold Ferrari 599GTB when my professors, friends and many...
A husband and wife were walking down a high street when the wife spots a beautiful diamond necklace in a jewelry store window. She urges her husband to go inside so that she can take a look at it. Although she wants it, he simply doesn’t have to buy it for her, but he promises that it’ll be hers one day. A...
A fifteen year old Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again. The boy asked, "What is this Father?" The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, "Son, I have never seen anything like this in...
Two lawyers, Jon and Amanpreet, head out for their usual 9 holes of golf. Jon offers Amanpreet a $50 bet. Amanpreet agrees and they're off. They shoot a great game. After the 8th hole, Amanpreet is ahead by one stroke, but cuts his ball into the rough on the 9th. "Help me find my ball. Look over there," he says to Jon. After a few...
A husband and wife were golfing when suddenly the wife asked, "Honey, if I died would you get married again?" The husband said, "No sweetie." The woman said, "I'm sure you would." So the man said, "Okay, I would" Then the woman asked, "Would you let her sleep in our bed?" And the man replied, "Ya, I guess so." Then the wife asked, "Would you...
Three drunken guys entered a taxi after a heavy night of drinking. Immediately realizing that the men were inebriated, he quickly thought up a plan to get rid of them. He started the engine, turned it off again and said: "We have reached your destination". "Alright pal, here you go," said the first guy as he gave him the money. The second guy...
One day a 12-year-old boy was walking down the street when a car pulled up beside him and the driver lowered a window. "I'll give you a large bag of M&Ms if you get in the car," said the driver. "No way! Get lost!" replied the boy. "How about a bag of M&Ms and 10 dollars?" the driver asked. "I said no way," replied...
One of the matrons of the church was cooking a pot of her famous beans for the church potluck. Her son, Little Johnny, came running through the house, BB gun in one hand, and a handful of BBs in the other. He tripped and the BBs, naturally, went right into the pot of beans. Thinking it over, Little Johnny could think of...
A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!" After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?" "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"
There are a pair of twins called Ving and Ling. Ving decided to go to the town hall to change his name. Ling decided to give him a lift there. When they arrived Ling reminded Ving that he would disgrace their family if he changed his name to Lee. Ving takes a form and quickly fills it out to change his name. He sends...
A lady helps her husband to set up a new laptop. Once it is completed, she tells him to select a password, selecting a word that he'll always remember. As the computer asks him to enter it, he looks at his wife and with a macho gesture and a wink in his eye, he types "[email protected](i)s". As he hits "enter" to validate...