Monday, April 22, 2019
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Tag: Slightly Dirty Jokes

Good Naughty Humor: Married Woman's Ultimate Fantasy In Three Words
A woman (mom) was sitting at a bar enjoying a cocktail after work one night, when the bar door opened and the most gorgeous hunk of a man she had ever seen entered. He was tall, muscular, and handsome, with thick dark hair and beautiful, sparkling green eyes, and his every movement was so masculine and sensuous that the woman could not...
Hilarious Dirty Parrots Joke Of The Day: Who Needs Prayers?
Joke Title: Who Needs Prayers? A lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing. They keep saying "Hi, we're hot. Do you want a date?" "That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed. "But I do have a solution to your problem. Bring your two parrots over to my...
Best Hilarious Dirty Comedy Joke: 85 Year Old Grandpa Vs Viagra
A man goes to visit his 85-year-old grandpa in the hospital. "How are you grandpa?" he asks. "Feeling fine," says the old man. "What's the food like?" "Terrific, wonderful menus." "And the nursing?" "Just couldn't be better. The young nurses really take care of you." "What about sleeping? Do you sleep OK?" "No problem at all -- nine hours solid every night. At 10 o'clock they bring...
Hilarious Grandma Vs Doctor Dirty Joke: Baby's First Clinic Visit
A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room,... waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam. The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight,.. and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed? "Breast-fed," she replied. "Well, strip down to your waist," the doctor ordered. She did. He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded,...
Best Dirty Joke Of The Day: World's Most Embarrassing Moments
There was a World wide survey of "Most Embarrassing Moment in human life" the finale had the following three incidents... Third Place "It was the day before my eighteenth birthday. I was living at home, but my parents had gone out for the evening, so I invited my girlfriend over for a romantic night alone. As we lay in bed after making love, we...
Enjoy These Best & Hilarious Bad Short Dirty Jokes: Dark Humor
There are 3 Male and 1 Female pencils in a box. The Female pencil got pregnant!! Which Male pencil is responsible? * * * * * * ANSWER: THE ONE WITHOUT THE RUBBER. Woman in bed with husband's best friend, phone rings! "YES".. "OK, BYE". She turns to her lover and says, * * * * * * * "THAT'S MY HUBBY, SAYS HE'S NOW GOLFING WITH YOU." Three Roosters: normal, retarded and a gay. Normal : cock-a-doodle-dooo !!! Retarded : doodle-cock-a-dooo...
Hilarious Stupid Sexy Joke Of The Day: Doctor v/s Decent Assistant
Joke Title: Mr. Paddy Doctor wanted to get off work and play golf, so he approached his assistant Paddy. "I am going golfing tomorrow Paddy and I don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all of our patients." "Yes, sir!" answers Paddy. The doctor goes off to golf and returns the following...
Hilariously Good Non Veg Joke Of The Day: SMART TIT FOR TAT
A very shy young man goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting alone. After an hour he gathers enough courage to go and ask her, "Er... excuse me, but would you mind if I sat here beside you?" She responds in a loud voice : "NO, I DON'T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!" Everyone in the bar turns to...
Best Hilarious Non Veg Joke: Pregnant Wife & Husband's Labor Pain
A man took his pregnant wife to the hospital to give birth. The doctor told them that he'd developed a new machine and asked if they'd like to try it. The machine would take some of the woman's pain away and give it to the father there by easing the mothers burden. The couple thought it was a good idea and agreed...
Naughty Smart Woman Joke: How To Inherit A Fortune
When Fred found out he was going to inherit a fortune,... when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with. So one evening he went to a singles bar where he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away. "I may look like just an ordinary man," he said as...
Hilarious Non Veg Joke Of The Day: Old Best Friends & Their Sons
Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party. After several drinks, one of the men had to use the restroom. Those who remained talked about their kids. The first guy said, "My son is my pride and joy. He started working at a successful company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied Economics and Business Administration and...
Hilariously Best Friends Bad Joke Of The Day: It Could Have Been Worse
Three friends had a very good friend named Joe and he was, naturally, an eternal optimist. At every bad situation he would always say "It could have been worse." His friends hated that quality about him, So they came up with a story so horrible that not even Joe could come up with a bright side. So the next day, only two of his...
Wow! Technology: Hilariously Comedy Bad Joke Of The Day
A guy walks into a bar and sits down. He starts dialing numbers... Like a telephone... On his hand and talking into his hand. The bartender walks over and tells him this is a very tough neighborhood and he doesn't need any trouble here. The guy says, "You don't understand. I'm very hi-tech. I had a phone installed in my hand because I...
Bad Comedy Joke Of The Day: Dad Got The Best Lie Detector
One day Jack's dad bought a robot. The robot was special in that it could detect a lie and would slap the person who lied on the face. Jack returned late from school that day and his dad asked him, "Son why are you late from school?". Jack answered, "Dad we had extra classes today". Much to his astonishment the Robot jumped up and...
Joke Of The Day: While Teaching A Class Of Good Manners
A teacher trying to teach good manners asked her students the following question: "Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?" Michael said: "Just a minute I have to go pee." The teacher responded by saying: "That would be rude and impolite. What about you Sherman,...
Hilarious Naughty Joke Of The Day: James Bond In Heaven
M sends James Bond on a secret mission to heaven. When M doesn't hear from Bond for over a day, he gets worried and calls up heaven. The Virgin Mary picks up the phone and says "Virgin Mary speaking." M asks her if Bond has reached there yet. She replies that he hasn't. M waits another few hours and calls heaven back again. "Virgin Mary speaking,"...
Hilarious Bad Joke: Little Johnny v/s Teacher's Dirty Thinking
A teacher asks her class:, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?" She calls on little Johnny. "None, they all fly away with the first gunshot." The teacher replies:, "The correct answer is 4, but I like the way you think." Then Little Johnny says:, "I have a question for YOU Madam. There are...
Hilarious Old Widows Naughty Joke: Best Senior Dating
Dorothy and Edna, two old age "senior" widows, are talking. Dorothy: "That nice George Johnson asked me out for a date,... I know you went out with him last week, and I wanted to talk with you about him before I give him my answer." Edna: "Well, I'll tell you,... what happened last week, He shows up at my apartment punctually at 7...
Hilarious Elderly Dirty Joke: 80-Year-Old Millionaire v/s Doctor's Advice
An 80-year-old millionaire becomes engaged to a beautiful 22-year-old model. He goes to his doctor for a checkup a couple of weeks before the wedding date. The doctor looks him over and says, "Bill, you seem completely healthy but I must tell you one thing." "What's that?", asks the millionaire. "At your age, sex can be dangerous, and you need to watch it, take...
Hilarious Best Comedy Animal Joke: Bear, Rabbit & Magical Frog
One day, down in the mystical forest, a magical frog was hopping towards a water hole. The forest was so enormous that the frog had never laid eyes on another animal before. But today, by chance a bear was chasing after a rabbit to have for dinner. The frog called for the two to stop and said, "Because you are the only two...
Best Naughty Joke Of The Day: Old Men Are Fast Thinkers Beware
The old farmer had a large pond in the back,.. fixed up nicely with picnic tables, a barbecue pit, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built. One evening, the old guy decided to go down to the pond and look it over. He hadn't been there for a...
Hilarious Dirty Best Lawyer Joke Of The Day: Getting A Date
There was a loser who couldn't get a date. He went to a bar and asked this one guy how to get a date. The guy said, "It's simple. I just say I'm a lawyer." So the guy went up to a pretty woman and asked her out. After she said "No," he told her that it was probably a good thing because...
Hilarious Naughty Doctor Joke Of The Day: Rusty Newborn Baby
After their baby was born, the panicked father went to see the Obstetrician. "Doctor," the man said, "I don't mind telling you, but I'm a little upset because my daughter has red hair. She can't possibly be mine." "Nonsense," the doctor said. "Even though you and your wife both have black hair, one of your ancestors may have contributed red hair to the...
Short Non Veg Joke Of The Day: Monk & Young Woman in Bus
Joke Title: Sitting For Two In a crowded bus an older Monk, asked a standing pretty young woman to sit on his lap, which woman did to avoid getting bumped to other opportunists standing around. In a short while she jumps and stands up. Anxious to help damsel in distress other passengers started watching curiously for what happened? Embarrassed Monk pleaded, "My child, please...
Hilarious Dirty Mind Humor Joke Of The Day: Send Men Immediately
A Lady Rector of a Ladies hostel was fond of using English language though she was not good in English. She was also fond of using very small sentences to communicate. Always in hurry she used to create lots if funny situations. Once the electricity of her ladies hostel went off at midnight that too during the examination season. She immediately contacted electricity...
Hilarious Bad Joke Of The Day: Little Girl v/s Pregnancy
Joke Title: Come let us A ten year old girl rushes to her grandmother and asks her, "Can I be pregnant?" Grandmother, "Are you fooling. You can not be pregnant. Go and play out side." The girl then goes to grandfather and asks him the same question and the reply also is the same. The girl goes to her father with the same question...
Hilarious Dirty Joke Of The Day: Country Doctors
A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a doctor who was retiring. The older gentleman suggested the young one accompany him on his rounds so the community could become used to a new doctor. At the first house a woman complained, "I've been a little sick to my stomach." The older doctor said, "Well, you've probably been overdoing the...